


Rain

by silver_ring5



Category: Arashi - Fandom, Johnny's Entertainment
Genre: Arashi - Freeform, F/M, Ohno Satoshi - Freeform, Ohno Satoshi -- Rain, Rain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-19
Updated: 2013-05-19
Packaged: 2017-12-12 08:29:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/809468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silver_ring5/pseuds/silver_ring5
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Inspired by the lyrics of Ohno's solo, Rain.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rain

The grass is cold, and it’s wet. Everything is wet. I try to push myself up but I can’t. I’m too cold. I’m too numb. I’m too tired. My cell phone is laying in the grass in front of me, the screen lighting up the night and reflecting in the shards of broken glass as it vibrates again and again and again.

 

I know who’s calling, without reading the name. My arms are too heavy to reach for it, and even if they weren’t, I wouldn’t answer. I don’t want him to see me like this. 

 

\-----

 

I’m hunched over my little mound of clay, the small sharp tool held tightly in my smudged hands as I debate how I want to continue my sculpture. I’m not an artist-- not in the creating art in a physical sense sort of way. I create stories, shape characters, paint scenes with words, but I don’t sculpt them from clay. The only reason I’m here is because I wanted to try it anyway, and because he’s good at it.

 

And he said he’d teach me, because I asked.

 

But it turns out his teaching is rather hands off-- he likes to give people the freedom to make mistakes and learn from them themselves. That’s what he tells me. He doesn’t like to over-involve himself. He knows he doesn’t like to learn that way; he doesn’t like when someone tries to smother his learning process.

 

But I’m failing pretty miserably, and he laughs. He laughs even louder when I shoot him a dirty look. Probably because he knows I don’t mean it, and maybe because I must have touched and dirtied my face, because suddenly he’s closer and his fingers are reaching for my cheek.

 

And I stop breathing. He stops laughing. His fingers are warm on my face, and he brings up his other hand. I can’t stop myself from looking at his mouth. It’s so close. He wets his lip, and I see the tip of a wet, pink tongue. I can’t stop staring.

 

He kisses me.

 

\-----

 

“Where are you going?” He sounds concerned, and he grips my wrist. It doesn’t hurt, but his strength is there. I pull away. It hurts in my chest. Burns in the corners of my eyes.

 

“You never used to ask,” I say, looking past him, “I don’t need to know everywhere you go.”

 

“Something’s wrong,” he responds, and even though I’m doing all that I can to look around him and focus on what’s behind him so he’s nothing more than a blur, I can tell his eyes are searching my face. He wants to understand.

 

But he can’t understand because he doesn’t know what I’ve become. He doesn’t know about the trouble Inoue got herself into; all the debt. That pretty side-show, Matsujun. He doesn't know. Maybe tonight will be the last night. We have to be close to paying it all back.

 

“Don’t go,” his voice is low, but I’m already walking away. I open the door, and dark clouds are rolling in. 

 

Maybe tonight will be the last time.

 

\-----

 

He’s addicted to my scent. He tells me this as his lips ghost over the curve of my neck. I shiver, knowing he’s the only person in the world who can make me feel this way. I love the way he smells too. I love that as we lie in bed, the sun rising slowly outside the window, I can smell him in the pillow, in the sheets. The entire room smells like him, and it’s perfect. 

 

I want to stay there forever. With his lips on my pulse and his fingers skimming everywhere, I never want to leave. I want to stop time.

 

\-----

 

The night didn’t start well. The guy came to pick me up, pulling his car up to the curb two blocks away from the subway station, just like I asked, but the rain had already begun to fall and I was drenched by the time he got there. 

 

My heels slipped a little on the sidewalk, but I got in the car without falling. The guy’s hand immediately fell on my leg, right above the knee and I forced myself not to squirm.

 

We’re driving now, out of the city. He’s talking the entire time, but I’m not listening. I just make agreeable sounds when necessary. My phone keeps vibrating in my purse. It’s distracting.

 

The weather suits my mood. The sun hasn’t set yet, but the sky is so dark and chilling. A little thoughtlessly, I press my lips to the cool glass of the window. My lipstick leaves a mark. The guy comments on it, something like, That’s hott. I don’t respond at all. I glance at my purse again.

 

“Go ahead and answer it,” the man is annoyed, “Tell whoever it is to leave us alone.”

 

\-----

 

“You don’t mean it,” he says simply, and he’s right. I don’t mean it. But I say it again anyway. I tell him we need to stop. That we can’t be together. This isn’t working.

 

He asks the questions that have building up inside him, the ones I knew he would. I avoid answering directly. I can’t bring myself to tell him. I start to cry, instead, and I hate myself for being so weak. He deserves better. I should get as far away from him as possible.

 

But he kisses me and takes me to bed, and I let myself love him just a little longer.

 

\-----

 

“Hello,” my voice sounds strange and quiet even to myself as I answer the call. The guy speeds up, despite how hard the rain is falling, to remind me he’s annoyed.

 

“Please come home,” the voice in the receiver says immediately, and hearing him feels so wrong and out of place while I’m in this other man’s car. He doesn’t even have a car. He can’t even drive.

 

I can’t cry. The speed-demon beside me would really be pissed if I did. I bring my phone away from my face to say, “I’m sorry. It’s my sister. This will only take a second.”

 

“I’m not your sister,” his voice is a little distorted over the phone, but I can hear the confusion and suspicion, “Who are you with?”

 

I can’t trust my voice to be steady, so I answer with a tight-lipped hum of “mhmm-mm”. No. 

 

I want to hang up, but before I do, I say, “I love you.” The words just slip from my mouth, and there’s a groan from the driver’s seat.

 

He must have heard the honesty in my voice, and heard that when I said “I love you,” I was also saying “Goodbye,” because before I can hit the “End Call” button, he’s pleading with me, reassuring me, “Hey now. I don’t wanna give up. This is only the beginning...”

 

He says more. He’s dependent on my scent. I can’t help the tears that squeeze their way out. He doesn’t want to give up.

 

Suddenly the car is jerking to the side, my body whipping with it, and we’re spinning. Tires are screeching. I don’t have time to scream. We jerk again. Harder. Glass is breaking. I’m flying forward. 

 

I’m breaking.

 

\-----

 

The rain’s still falling. It keeps me awake. It’s so cold. It bites the skin that I can still feel. I think I hear someone running, the sound of feet on the pavement coming closer. But I’m not near the road anymore. I’m not even near the car.

 

The feet stop. I can’t see much, but there’s someone at the broken vehicle wrapped around the tree. The person stoops over, and suddenly there’s the most anguished sound. The sound of a heart breaking.

 

And I recognize that heart.

 

He’s rushing around the car, shouting my name. He pulls out his phone, which I can only tell because his hand lights up and then he brings that light to his ear.

 

My phone vibrates in the grass again, and he gasps. He finds my phone before he sees me.

 

Warm. His chest is so warm, and it hurts, but I want it so badly. I want his arms to never let go. I just want him to hold me.

 

We’re waiting for the ambulance. He tells me he called them. They’re coming. They’ll be here soon. I have to keep my eyes open. I can’t fall asleep on him. 

 

I don’t want to. I just want to look at his eyes. He has beautiful eyes... but they’re blurring now. I’m having trouble focusing.

 

“Hey, this is only the beginning. This isn’t a game. This is only the beginning. I won’t love anyone else.”


End file.
